Princess Problems

Got to see my in-laws tonight.  They're good peeps.  My mother-in-law is a huge fan of vintage bags and even gave me one of her prized Enid Collins box bags as an engagement gift #@vda$%!aoi&? *cough* years ago.

She has a friend who owns a no-shit Rolex.  I got to hold it once.  It was like a gift from Santa I didn't even know I wanted.  It was heavy.  I felt good.  It would sparkle in a pitch black room.  I shall never forget it.

Want to hear something that will make you swoon?  The lady got it for freeeeeeeeee.  It was her 25th anniversary gift or something like that because she worked for Rolex.  I don't know if it was her first one or not.  But after that, I know for certain this is one luxury label that has earned it's stripes.  Straight up functional art.

I don't think I could ever own one, though.  Not unless I found a pre-owned one for a very good deal.  Someone in my position can't really justify blowing that kind of scratch on something my phone already does.  Plus watches present a challenge to left-handed people who write a lot and use a mouse for long periods of time of a daily basis.

Do you think I really should have been born a princess?  I do.  Working is fine and all but I truly believe in my heart that my calling isn't to be wealthy necessarily but to be surrounded 24/7 by my favorite things and learn life's lessons from other people's mistakes so I'd never have to make my own and also be able to hire people to do things I don't like... changing the litter box, laundry, waking up before noon.

If a princess wants to have cocktails for dinner with her besties even if it's a school night, she can.  Because princesses don't wake up before noon.  Hello.  Princesses are cute.  It's called beauty rest for a reasonnn.  Pay attention.  (That was for my benefit, not yours.)

Princesses can spend 3 hours putting on makeup and then go to the mall with their girlz and buy more makeup and go home and put makeup on each other and drink more cocktails and maybe play with their hair or glue sparkly things on their iPhone cases.

What they don't do is stuff that prevents them from wearing a Rolex.  Or any wrist jewelry.  How this has anything to do with seeing my in-laws tonight, I do not know.

It would just be nice if I could, for once, wear a bracelet all day long without issue.

This is the stellar
Lia Sophia Party Favor bracelet.
I'd like to wear mine complication-free.

The most frustrating part.

Mean people are awful but their meanness is actually the second most frustrating thing about encountering them.  The most frustrating thing is, for me, the inability to comprehend WHY they are mean.

It's kind of silly to call a major media outlet mean.  So many people contribute content that it really is impossible to asses whether they intend to be hurtful.  Perhaps some do but I don't think CNN would be one of them.

CNN did frustrate me today though, and it was due to a mean girl encounter sooo the two aren't ... what's the term?  Mutually exclusive?  Unrelated?  I don't know but I think you get it.

For the past several Fridays, CNN.com has posted stories about body image and perceptions of beauty.  Miss American's anorexia recovery was one of them.  There was also a story about FATshion.  My heart did a little woot woot when I read that one.

Today, I read this story by Shanon Cook who is incredulous that a man found her pregnant silhouette attractive.  She used so many fat slurs it was like someone played a tape loop of my past.  I wanted to crawl under my desk and induce puking into my trash can.

For obvious reasons, acceptance, tolerance and kindness are high on my wish list for society.  My story is not uncommon.  Because I am fat, I was brutally bullied from 6th grade until I graduated high school.  Even in adulthood I have been called names in public, humiliated and physically assaulted over my weight.  That's probably why my blogs don't have a lot of range.  They're either completely shallow fluff or they're about the things that hurt me.  Write what you know.  ^_^

Being treated like a piece of subhuman shit due to my appearance hurts me.  Wouldn't that hurt almost everyone?  So when I see news pieces, TeeVee shows, movies, pictures, etc. that are size positive or even size neutral, I do a mental cartwheel because it means that maybe history will stop repeating itself.

But then I read Shanon Cook's piece and I think it will never get better.

Here are some examples of what she said:

"And then there was the belly -- a massive dome of a thing, so immense that Lennox looked like a wee Scottish lass beside me. Jessica-Simpson-on-the-cover-of-Elle, no. Sexy, I was not."

"I didn't tell him that excitement doesn't really register when it takes a forklift and three bodybuilders to raise you out of bed in the morning."

"This dude thought I was hot. But how could he? I mean, I looked like an upright hippopotamus."

Wait, though, it gets really confusing and that added fuel to the frustration fire.

She says pregnancy allows women to not be neurotic about their size for a moment, so she enjoyed it by eating "truckloads" of candy and feeling good in spite of herself.

What?

Did I miss something?  Is she saying that only when you are pregnant can you love your body if it's big? And CNN published it?

Why?  Why can't we love our bodies always, regardless of how big or small?  And why does CNN give us an entire series about diverse beauty and body image then turn around and run another tired old fat = gross story?

Seems like every publication goes balls out when it comes to fat hate stories yet they'll print an anti-bullying story on the very next page.  What message is this?  Is it intentional?

Hate totally bums me out.  It hurts; it causes me to ask all these questions and the absolute most frustrating part is that I will never know the answer.