They have valid points with scenarios like a friend who gossips to your mother or some coworker you didn't know you couldn't trust. We have probably all gotten fried asshairs from people like that taking something you share and twisting it for whatever excuse.
What I say now I'm just going to say because everyone who matters to me already knows this anyway.
I don't care.
If someone is going to try to use an aspect of my own life against me, first of all, unless I'm Miss Fucking Cleo, I won't see it coming. Not much we can do to prepare for nor avoid some stuff.
Secondly, if someone is a backstabber, stab today; don't wait for tomorrow. Wouldn't you rather the bad seeds reveal themselves immediately? You can't tell me you would prefer they suck you in and fuck with your feelings first. (However, if you are a masochist, then the latter makes sense and I don't judge.)
I do not happen to be a masochist.
In the event of a dick, be a dick and get it done. That way we can both go on with life. I won't waste your time. Plz don't waste mine.
Third and finally ...
My golden rule is simple.
I'm going to be me. You be you. If we have that magic thing, then let's have tacos.
The magic thing between two people is beyond explanation. But anyone who has felt it, hopefully everyone, knows it when they do feel it.
Magic does not require us to have all things in common. But I will let you know if a line has been crossed and you let me know too. If we can't resolve to drive around the potholes together and keep rolling, then stop the bus.
We can and should end relationships that are or become toxic. Shit happens. See you in another life, maybe. Just drop me off at the curb and I will call an Uber.
Fuck me over ... Possibly different outcome. It depends. I live in a lot of grey area. Crossing bridges as I come to them if the escalator is out of service. And yes, I use a map and a moral compass.
My way of social-ing is not everyone's taste. A lot of people, intelligent people, are super trepidatious with their social media and/or live-lives. They do what makes them comfortable.
If you opt for doing the living out loud thing with fellow live humans or on the webernet, accept that there are consequences.
Talk about how much you love murdering tiger cubs with dull ninja stars? Expect and respect that most people will fucking wish you to fall off a cliff then roll down a hill of sharp rocks and slowly rot in a swampy ravine.
In case it isn't clear, if you're a sociopath, don't be surprised when you end up living in a camper with rabid toads and only have one Facebook friend - your Auntie Ernestine whose account has been untouched since the day her granddaughter set it up and showed her how to like the fan page of 'Dancing with the Stars' and join the machine-quilters anonymous group.
Those are the kind of people I envision when I hear friends' advice and read headlines about social media drama.
I'm not always kosher but I'm also not a sociopath. Despite my faults, I try to do the right thing in sincerely almost all scenarios. (Grey areas!) Intentionally inflicting emotional pain isn't fun to me. Knowing this about myself, I think that at least helped me lose my capacity to care about haters of any type.
Please note: I am NOT saying bullying doesn't hurt me. It hurts everyone. It's wrong. It's bullshit. It should never triumph if it is keeping you from freely expressing yourself.
Buuut ... I don't care enough about bullies to let them stop me from growing whatever the fuck I want in the garden of my life-o-sphere.
No matter what they do, I'm always going to keep it simple, being my authentic self.
I have either developed or earned emotional scar tissue. Not sure how to look at that.
My scars are the reason I don't fret about consequences of not caring what haters hate when it comes to me and my life both online or analog.
